Chapter Thirty One

Create a playlist at MixPod.com



Jon pulled up outside the sprawling Middletown house that he had built with Dorothea years ago for them to raise their family in. Everything was as immaculate as ever, the lawns mowed in perfect lines, the hedges trimmed neatly. The wide expanse of the Navesink River flowed behind the house or to the front depending on which way you looked at it. A few lights glowed here and there as dusk began to settle and a slight mist rose off the calm water of the river.

Grabbing the pizza he’d collected on the way over, he kicked the car door shut behind him with his boot and made his way to the door. Before he got there the porch light came on and the door swung inwards. Dot stood leaning in the doorway smiling slightly,

“Hey……wasn‘t expecting you out here tonight?”

Jon eyed her over the pizza box and smiled hesitantly, “Yeah well I figured it was easier to just come here to talk…hungry?”

Standing back to allow him in the doorway, she stuck her nose out and sniffed the air appreciatively. “Pepperoni…mmnn…smells good.”

They followed one another into the vast kitchen that had been designed to allow for both home and corporate purposes. Jon slid the pizza box onto the enormous oak table that provided the centre piece of the room and glanced around him.

“Where are the kids? It’s awful quiet around here?”

Dot motioned upstairs as she pulled a bottle of wine from the cooler and hooked down two tall wine glasses from the overhead rack.

“Romey’s just gone down, Jessie and Jake are in the games room and Steph’s gone out with some friends for dinner.” Sidling into a chair beside Jon, she yawned as she uncorked the bottle and poured them both a large glass. “I don’t feel so guilty about opening a whole bottle now you’re here” Clinking her glass against his, she took a sip and sighed with satisfaction.

Jon returned the toast and grabbed a slice of the still steaming pizza, he was absolutely starving by now. They sat in silence for a minute as he devoured two whole slices and Dot sipped at her wine, watching him in amusement.

Finally he stopped for a break, sitting back in his chair and groaning. He gave her an apologetic look as he took a sip from his glass, “Sorry but I was fucking starving!”

“So I can see!” she laughed lightly picking up a slice of her own to nibble at. “You got my message then?”

“Yeah, so what’s going on?” Jon looked at her over his glass, “You wanted to talk?”

“I went up to the farm today, thought I better check out what it was all about properly.” She lightly tapped the table with a finger, “Impressive Jon……as usual you’ve thought of everything!”

Jon looked at her warily, the sarcasm in her voice, although less potent as of late, was still there nonetheless. He chose to say nothing, he’d learnt lately that silence was sometimes the best policy.

“Steph is determined, I can see that, she even painted half the barn - our daughter? Paint?” she exclaimed with a smirk. “She never fails to surprise me!”

“She wants this Dot, so do I…”, Jon spoke up quietly staring at his wine, “I haven’t seen her as happy since I don’t know when.”


“Hmm I can see that…oh and I finally met the great Jennifer”, Dorothea threw her arms up with a flourish. “I have to admit she’s not what I expected.”

“Oh yeah? What did you expect?”, Jon eyed her carefully.

“I dunno”, she pursed her lips looking thoughtful, “Someone a little older perhaps, she seems so young to have accomplished all the things Steph keeps telling me about.”

“Paul said she’s the best out there,” He shrugged his shoulders casually, “He’s never steered us wrong so far…”

Dorothea ran her fingers through her long dark hair, pushing it off her face. “She doesn’t mince her words anyhow, that’s for sure!”

Jon looked at her sharply, “Why? What did she say to you?”

“Oh just something along the lines of not tolerating being messed around, blah, blah. I don’t think she appreciated me muscling in on all of your well laid plans!” She arched her eyebrows and rolled her eyes with a grim smile.

Leaning forward Jon fixed her with a steely glare, “Dot tell me you weren‘t a bitch to her? Tell me you didn‘t mess this up for Steph!”

Angry dark eyes flashed back at him. “Why am I always the bitch? If YOU had discussed this with me properly I wouldn’t have had to go over there and ruffle her pretty little feathers! And DON‘T make this all about Steph when you know very well it‘s not!”

Jon bit his lip to stop himself saying something he shouldn’t. Draining his glass, he picked angrily at a knot in the knarled wood surface of the table. He spoke with gritted teeth, “And how exactly did you ruffle her feathers so to speak?”

“I told her that WE had to discuss this before it went any further and that I want Steph to study at the same time as competing!” She glared back, silently daring him to cross her, “Nothing that was at all unreasonable in my view, as I keep telling you Jon, Steph is OUR daughter!”

He laughed dryly, “Yes Dot, so you keep telling me! Message received loud and clear, yet again!”

“Anyway, like I said she wasn’t impressed, got quite upset actually,” pouring them both another glass of wine, she set the bottle back down watching Jon from the corner of her eyes, “She seems to be very…how should I put it?……invested… in this whole thing.”

Jon flushed and snapped, “God dammit Dot, of course she is! She moved country to train OUR daughter for chrissake!”

“I‘m just wondering was that the only reason?” She crossed her arms and stared defiantly across at him.

“What the fuck is that supposed to mean?” Jon jumped off his chair in disgust, grabbing his wine glass as he strode over to the French doors to stare out at the river. “Why do you always have to make a big deal out of everything Dot?”

“Being married to you for the last twenty years has taught me a thing or two Jon!” she fired back at him as she watched his reaction.

Shaking his head sadly Jon threw back what was left in his glass and slowly returned to the table. The wine was starting to take effect and he suddenly felt drained of life. Emptying the last of the bottle’s contents between their two glasses, he sat down again to face her.

“We can’t keep doing this to each other, it’s pointless…” he paused, wearily running his hands through his hair before sadly adding, “I don’t know how to fix this.”

Nodding slowly in agreement, Dorothea looked at him with regret, the anger suddenly gone from her face. “So much has been going on lately and I can’t remember the last time we actually just sat and did………this. Just talked.”

Jon slowly swivelled his glass on the table, watching as the pale amber liquid gently sloshed from side to side. “I know…..”

They both gazed down at their respective glasses, the silence lingering until Dot spoke softly, “I still miss us you know?”

Sighing heavily, Jon reached across the table for her hand, letting his fingers entwine hers. “Me too baby.”

“Why did we stop making each other happy Jonny? Where did we go wrong?” Dot’s deep brown eyes were moist, the lines around them creased in sadness.

“Hey…sssh”, he gripped her hand watching forlornly as a tear slipped down her cheek, “I don’t know…”

Jesus he was making every woman in his life miserable tonight, what the hell was he doing wrong? He knew he had played a major part in wrecking his marriage, being married to a rock star wasn’t exactly postcard material for a rosy home life.

“I guess we thought we didn’t have to try anymore?” Bowing his head he rubbed his temples with his spare hand, the other still slowly stroking the back of Dorothea's. “I’m sorry Dottie, for everything. You deserve better than I can be.”

“You were all I ever needed,” she whispered. “Nothing else mattered for so long, I don’t know what changed……” her voice trailed off into the silence.

They sat like that for a good five minutes, both lost in thoughts as their fingers found the familiar creases of one another’s hands. Eventually she pulled her hand free and got up stiffly to retrieve an envelope from a drawer.

Speaking quietly she placed the starched white envelope on the table and slid it across to Jon.

“There’s nothing else really left to say baby is there?” Moving to stand by him she gripped his shoulder and stooped to drop a gentle kiss on his head, briefly running her fingers through his hair to smooth it down. “I’m sorry too.” Leaving him staring at the envelope she silently left the kitchen, closing the door behind her with a soft click.

The discreet black printed letters screamed out silently at him as he struggled to focus on what he was reading,

Douglas & Mandel LLP
150 Madison Avenue
New York, NY 10022

There was only one reason why Dot would be giving him a letter from this company - she was filing for divorce. A hard lump formed in his throat and he bit his fist hard, feeling a hot tear scorch it’s way down his cheek. Blinking hard he gazed at the room around him, adorned with pictures and mementos of a life filled with happiness. Finally his watering eyes came to rest on the large black and white framed photograph hanging above the wood burning stove. It had been taken on a sandy beach a few years back when they’d been on vacation. Locked together in an embrace, they’d had eyes for each other only, lost in their own private moment that the photographer had somehow managed to capture. Succumbing to the tears, he rested his head on the table, feeling a stranger in his own home as the realisation that his marriage was truly over swept through him.